Showing posts with label humour darwin college. Show all posts
Showing posts with label humour darwin college. Show all posts

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

The Perfect Start

Genre: Life

This post was supposed to be published on Monday, January 12th 2009 but thanks to ever (un)reliable MTNL TriBand, I had to delay it by one day.

Though the college opened officially last Monday, today was practically the "First Day of Last Semester" with regular attendance (of both- students and professors). And what a start it was!

First of all, the first scheduled lecture of the semester started bang on time at 11.15am. I, not expecting this even in my dreams, was hanging around in the Quadrangle and casually entered the class only at 11.35am, only to find the Fat Old Lady blabbering Data Communication. However, this didn't last long. She changed track midway and gave a full twenty minute lecture on how indisciplined we (the students of Tronix) are and how we would be passing this to our children and how it is still not too late to "improve". During the speech, she repeated no less than six times that the Corridor outside our class is not meant for standing and gossiping but for the professors to walk (I am sure somebody must have blocked her way earlier in the day to trigger this talkathon!)

This was followed by the first "Mass Birthday" celebration of the semester wherein we cut one common cake for all classmates whose birthdays fell in the last month or will fall this month. The mandatory "kicking-the-ass-of-the-birthday-boy" ritual (also called Birthday Bumps) attracted one of the many watchmen on the prowl and we got the second "scolding" of the day in less than an hour!

Ofcourse, this was not going to stop us. So, the commotion continued and ten minutes later, an unknown female teacher walked in, once again lecturing us that "classes are going on elsewhere you should go to 'Triangle' (its 'Quadrangle', madam!!) and celebrate birthdays!". At first we thought she was the teacher appointed for us for the 12.15pm lecture and we all settled down quietly but when she walked out after the scolding, it dawned upon us that she was getting disturbed in the adjoining class! This gave us open ground to complete the celebrations.

Enough of partying in the classroom, we headed to the Quadrangle and as expected, within five minutes, a watchman came and tried (in vain) to shoo us away from there, but not before dishing out his dose of lecture on discipline. FOUR back to back admonitions labelling us mischievous and indisciplined!! Now, that's what I call a perfect start to the last semester in college!

This is not all. An impromptu treat thrown in by the birthday guys and girls took us (a herd of no less than 30) to our regular roadside adda, ironically named 'Health' for downing sumptous Cheese Grilled Sandwiches (they taste even better when they are FREE!) Special thanks to Praju and Dharmavarapu Jagannath Venkata Sai Vimal Rao (yeah, that's his REAL name!) for this!

On returning to college, I accomplished the biggest achievement of the semester- got my coveted Railway Concession Form from the lethargic woman in the Admin Office in the first attempt! VJTI students will swear that this certainly deserves an applause!

This was followed by a rowdy get-together in the MuP Lab (our air-conditioned secret hideout where no other students are allowed) with a long outrageously hilarious session of viewing photos from recent class trips. And then came the best part- somebody suggested that we should go out for a one day trip "sometime in near future". A dozen odd ideas flew thick and fast and within thirty minutes, the plan was ready- we shall be going to a farmhouse of one of our classmates- not next month or next week, but tomorrow itself! A phone call here and a sms there and voila! 21 students confirm their participation for the trip in less than 21 minutes!

Before dispersing for the day, the cherry on the cake was Free coffee being served by a Nescafe advertising kiosk set up outside our class as a part of the ongoing inter-college sports festival! The kind of people that we are, somebody actually asked for one coffee "extra-strong" and one "with less sugar." All this at the FREE Coffee stall! The vendor, unable to bear this torture, simply walked away!

This brought to an end a really memorable First Day of Semester and I am sure the days to come will only be better!

Sunday, February 25, 2007

Darwin's Theory Of Natural Selection- Simplified@College!

     We have all heard about it and learned it back in school days but here I present- Darwin's theory of Evolution- Simplified at College campus!

The four main points of Darwin's theory are as follows-

1. Over-Population

"In Nature, favourable natural breeding conditions lead to a population explosion of any species."
Meaning, The boys-to-girls ratio in the college is highly skewed with only 30% girls and only 25% of them smart and beautiful. This makes it to around 1 girl for every 5 boys in college.

2. Struggle for existence

"The Over Population leads to inter-specific and intra-specific struggle for survival amongst the individuals of any species"
Simply put, The imbalanced boys:girls ration leads to a competition among the boys to woo and impress the beautiful and smart girls in college. This may occasionally lead to violent brawls in the campus and generates jealousy amongst the boys.

3. Natural Selection


"The Female of any Species naturally selects the Male with maximum Positive traits to ensure generation of a healthy Gene Pool in the next Generation."
In Other words, under this circumstances, the girls are spoilt for choice and they take their own sweet time to check out all possible options and select the most handsome and smart guy as her boyfriend, thereby leaving the other guys stranded. This will in future ensure tha birth of Mr. Handsome or Miss Beautiful to the couple in the future.

4. Survival Of The Fittest

"After Natural Selection, only the Fittest Males survive and pass on their genes to the next generation while the unfit ones slowly get extinct."
That is, The smartest boy gets the most beautiful girl and gets to enjoy spending time and going on dates with her while the other guys slowly disappear out of the college scene, single and dejected.

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