Wednesday, June 15, 2011

The India Flight Checklist

Genre: Travel

The next time you take a flight to India from any airport in the United States, or vice versa, take this checklist along and cross out each event as it happens. If you happen to cross out everything, be rest assured your flight was normal.

[ ] A perfectly healthy senior citizen walks up to the airport check-in counter and asks for "free" wheelchair assistance.

[ ] A queue of 100+ passengers forms at the gate long before boarding is to begin

[ ] "Pre-boarding for passengers with small kids" is announced and passengers with 15 year old kids queue up to board

[ ] "Boarding Rows 31 and above" is announced and a passenger with seat in row under 30 walks up to gate, only to be sent back

[ ] Atleast one passenger approaches to request 'seat adjustment'

[ ] A Smart Alec reclines his/her seat after Flight Attendants have checked everyone's seats to be upright for takeoff preparation

[ ] A cellphone rings minutes after captain has announced "Turn off all electronic devices"

[ ] A passenger stands up and/or walks in the aisle after the plane has started taxiing towards the runway.

[ ] Queue forms outside restrooms, in spite of "Restroom Occupied" signs illuminated and visible.

[ ] A passenger takes out a bag of thepla when dinner is served

[ ] More than half of the total number of meals loaded onboard are labelled AVML (Asian Vegetarian Meal)

[ ] A passenger asks for two servings of alcohol. At once.

[ ] The moment the plane touches down, 100 people stand up from their seats and choke the aisles, and stare blankly.

[ ] A passenger runs and/or pushes fellow passengers on the way to board the bus to the terminal

Yes we are Indians. We are like that only.


  1. Hahahah loved it! Pata nahi yeh log kaunsi marathon bhaagne jaate hain jo plane touchdown hote hi they start getting ready. Like seriously!

  2. except for a few here and there(restroom occupancy, 100 passengers in queue and passengers under 30 rows being sent back), I have not seen any of these things happening in any of my travels :P.

  3. This happens on flights from Australia to India too. Was on Qantas Flight 123 SYD-DRW-BOM. We landed at BOM and the moment we taxied off the runway came to a brief halt. Half the passengers made a scrum for the door. The Aussie crew from Darwin were just bewildered.


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